Quiet

So apparently I listen to music waaaay too loud. Except like... I don't? Or like, nobody during all these eight months ever said anything. Mentioned anything. Like, I have headphones, dude. I just prefer the speakers. They're not even good speakers, you know? Just the cheap wireless stuff you can get for 10$ at Walmart. I never bothered to get anything better. Besides, that was the whole point of grabbing that corner office. I don't get it... Are those walls made of paper? What's the point of giving people their own rooms, then? [[>_>->rant1a]] [[^^->rant2]] [[...->rant2]]

Look, Kate does it too, alright? And nobody ever gets on HER case. Moving on. [[...->rant2]]

So, this doesn't make any sense, right? Except I talked to Kate and FINALLY she told me that Elena just really hates Bieber - and, ya know me, I listen to that campy shit A LOT. It's just... I need music, and most of the other stuff distracts me. Bieber's just on the edge of bad enough that I don't worry about it. [[...->rant3]]

Okay, fuck it. I like it, alright? I like Bieber's music. Don't judge! I can't help it. No more than you can help listening to that crappy Babymetal band. [[>:C->rant3a]] [[>_>->rant3a]] [[...->rant3a]]

Oh, alright, alright - I'm just trying to rile you up. [[...->rant4]]

But, yeah - back to the story. So, it wasn't just Bieber - apparently my coffee mugs are "inherently offensive" and "promote and normalize sexist attitudes towards women". Like, seriously, I've never seen someone throw such a hissy fit over a "Queen Bitch" mug. Because "bitch" is apparently not a word we can use anymore. [[>_>->rant5]] [[:<->rant5]] [[...->rant5]]

Ughhhh. Fuck. It's not like I care about the mugs, really. Or the music. It's that they wouldn't just TELL ME that it was a problem. Like, what's the logic of getting pissier and pissier for eight months and THEN throwing the perpetrator off the cliff rather than just... having one simple conversation. I don't get it. [[:/->rant6]] [[>_>->rant6]] [[...->rant6]]

Like, apparently they've been throwing me HINTS all this time? So at least now I know what all those stink-eyes were for. Or all those Enya CDs I kept finding on my desk - mystery solved. [[:D->rant7]] [[...->rant7]] [[:/->rant7]]

But like... fuck all that. I DON'T know what's in their heads. I don't know why they didn't just talk to me. Like a person. That's how it's supposed to work, right? You want something - you ask for it. Simple. [[:>->rant8]] [[;f->rant8]] [[...->rant8]]

So yeah, I guess I'm just a little bummed out. A LOT bummed out. I mean, all this time... wasted. Sufferring in silence. Just because they didn't wanna upset me. Man. That's... that's awful. Aaaaand... I need a new job now. Great. [[:<->rant9]] [[>:C->rant9]] [[...->rant9]]

Thanks. For listening. [[^^->rant10]] [[:<->rant10]] [[...->rant10]]

... Actually... there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about. [[?->co1]] [[:>->co1]] [[...->co1]]

... I've been thinking. Because of what happened today - but not just today. About what's been happening for... a while now. ... What ARE we, exactly? Are we friends? More than friends? Because I don't even know anymore. [[<_<->co1b]] [[:>->co1c]] [[...->co1a]]

No! No. You don't get to stay quiet now. Not this time. Look - I was the one who asked you out. I suggested we start meeting. I told you how I feel... And from you - nothing. I mean, you went along with it all but you never really told me what this was to you. What YOU wanted. It's like I'M always taking all the risks. It's always just me starting things and you graciously accepting. I'm shouldering all the risk here while you... you just kick back and decide whether you're enjoying the ride. You think this is easy? Always guessing what you want. Guessing what you mean. With almost nothing to get off of. Look - I really like you, but I can't be the only one pushing this relationship forward. I can't make all the decisions, Alex. Not without knowing what you want. You know, sometimes I wonder... ... Do you even care about me? Or is it just... convenient. A nice little ride to enjoy. [[:)->co2ac]] [[<_<->co2ab]] [[...->co2aa]]

Look, I KNOW this conversation is uncomfortable. But... we need to have it at some point. I can't just... keep guessing what you mean from your reactions. Some things need to be said. With words. [[:c->co2ca]] [[:)->co2cb]] [[>_>->co2cc]] [[...->co2cd]]

Yeah, no, that's what the problem is, don't you see? You put on a smile and think it's enough? I DON'T know what you're thinking, Alex. And no matter how good I am at guessing, I can't always be right. It's not... it's not NOTHING, you know? And I don't mind once or twice, but I can't keep guessing all the time. [[:c->co2ca]] [[:)->co2cb]] [[>_>->co2cc]] [[...->co2cd]]

Is it? Is that what you're trying to say? I don't even know anymore. Talk to me, dammit. Say something. Anything. For once, tell me something I don't have to guess. [[:>->co2aa]] [[:<->co2aa]] [[>_>->co2aa]] [[...->co2aa]]

You don't, do you? Was that sarcasm? I thought I could tell, but I don't even know what to think anymore. Words, Alex - can you use them? Am I worth one or two? [[:C->co3aba]] [[:)->co3abc]] [[>_>->co3abd]] [[...->co3abb]]

I hate this. I hate your non-answers. You only talk when it's safe, don't you? When it's superficial, unimportant. When it's pretty darn fucking convenient. You talked to me about those damn Star Wars movies more than you ever talked about us. [[: >->co3aaa]] [[<_<->co3aab]] [[:c->co3aad]] [[...->co3aac]]

No. NO! You don't get to make a sad face and hope it makes everything alright. Talk to me, dammit. Tell me what you WANT. Tell me you hate me. Anything. Please. [[:>->co4abab]] [[>_>->co4abac]] [[...->co4abaa]]

... You know what? FINE. Fine. It's your turn to talk now, Alex. Take the initiative. Guess whatever the fuck I mean. I'm done talking. [[...->end]] [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]]

Thank you for playing **Quiet**         For all the conversations unhad - I'm sorry [[Menu->TITLE]]

... Okay, then. Goodbye. [[...->end]] [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]]

Oh, sure. Smile and think everything will be alright why don't you. You know what? NO! No. No more of that crap. I'm done. If you want something - talk to me like a fucking person. Otherwise... go. I'm done making up your words for you. [[...->end]] [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]]

So that's how you wanna play it? FINE. Find me if you find your voice somehow. Me, I'm done talking. [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

No. I can't keep doing this, Alex. I can't just keep guessing. If you have anything to tell me, tell me. Me? I'm done talking. [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

... Is that how you wanna play it? It's not gonna work, Alex. If you want something, say it. I'm done making up your words for you. [[...->end]] [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]]

Oh, is that how you've always wanted to do this, then? With me, ALWAYS shouldering all the risk? Always the one on the hook when I get something wrong? It's called a CONVESATION, Alex. Look it up. I'll be here if you want to talk. [[: D->end]] [[;/->end]] [[:C->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

Is that so? Star Wars is worth a conversation, but not this? I can't... I can't keep doing this, Alex. I can't keep guessing. I... I thought I could help you open up a little, but... you're just gonna keep coasting, aren't you? [[:<->co4aaba]] [[:)->co4aabb]] [[>_>->co4aabd]] [[...->co4aabc]]

A sad face ain't gonna do it this time, Alex. No matter how good I'm at reading you, I can't guess what I don't friggin know. Some things you just gotta tell me yourself. Use words, you know? Can you? [[:>->co4aabc]] [[;/->co4aabc]] [[<_<->co4aabc]] [[...->co4aabc]]

You really can't, can you? You're that emotionally stunted? Well, I'm done being your crutch. For once, let's have a real conversation. With words. Where I don't have to guess. And you can tell me exactly what you want. And I don't... I don't have to anticipate your every wish. Because you just tell me. Like person. Like a fucking human being. Please. [[:)->...-end]] [[<_<->...-end]] [[:<->...-end]] [[...->...-end]]

No. A sad face ain't gonna do it, Alex. Not this time. I'm done talking. Your turn. [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

Wait - you really think that's a good thing? Oh, that's rich. It is. You know what? No. No more of that. I ain't gonna keep doing this for you. From now on, if you wanna get something - SAY IT. With friggin words, for once. I'm done talking. Your turn. [[?->end]] [[:c->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

No, Alex, I don't care. It's not fair, making me guess what you want all the time. If that's what you want, then... I don't know. Find somebody who's into that. I'm done. [[:C->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

That's what I thought. [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

... [[?->end]] [[;__;->end]] [[<_<->end]] [[...->end]]

A sad face ain't gonna do it, Alex. Not this time. I need words. From you. And, you know - it wouldn't hurt if YOU were the one to ask me something every once in a while. Because now... it's just me starting things and you deciding whether you're gonna acccept the idea or not. I mean - I was the one who asked you out. I suggested we start meeting. I told you how I feel... And from you - nothing. And I keep wondering... Is it because you want me to take all the risks? Or you just don't care. [[:C->co3caa]] [[<_<->co3cab]] [[...->co3cac]]

No, that's EXACTLY what I'm telling you is wrong. I KNOW you'd just keep it going exactly as we are. Or... I think I know? That's what you keep suggesting. Or... that's what I'm reading into it. See? I can't keep going like this. You need to tell me what you want, or... ... You know. It would be nice if, sometimes... you'd ASK me something. Coz I don't... I don't wanna keep pushing if that's not what you want. And I feel like I'm always the one who asks, always the one who... needs something. Yeah. It would be nice if every once in a while you'd just... do something yourself for a change. [[:)->co3cba]] [[>_>->co3cbb]] [[:c->co3aba]] [[...->co1a]]

Oh, is that how it is? All is well while I do everything YOU want, but when I, for once, want something from you... Are you suddenly INCONVENIENCED? Fuck. Why did I let this go on for so long... It's always just me starting things and you graciously accepting. I'm shouldering all the risk here while you... you just kick back and decide whether you're enjoying the ride. Do you... do you ever think to ask ME what I want? ... Do you even care? [[:)->co2ac]] [[<_<->co2ab]] [[...->co2aa]]

Look - I was the one who asked you out. I suggested we start meeting. I told you how I feel... And from you - nothing. It's like I'M always taking all the risks. It's always just me starting things and you graciously accepting. I'm shouldering all the risk here while you... you just kick back and decide whether you're enjoying the ride. You think this is easy? Always guessing what you want. Guessing what you mean. With almost nothing to get off of. Look - I really like you, but I can't be the only one pushing this relationship forward. I can't make all the decisions, Alex. Not without knowing what you want. You know, sometimes I wonder... ... Do you even care about me? Or is it just... convenient. A nice little ride to enjoy. [[:)->co2ac]] [[<_<->co2ab]] [[...->co2aa]]

Yeah, no - a happy face just ain't gonna cut it, Alex. You think, what, you'll smile now and we'll go back to exactly where we were? Coz I think that that's what you think will happen. And I'm here to tell you it won't. Look - I really like you, but I can't be the only one pushing this relationship forward. I can't make all the decisions, Alex. Not without knowing what you want. You know, sometimes I wonder... ... Do you even care about me? Or is it just... convenient. A nice little ride to enjoy. [[:)->co2ac]] [[<_<->co2ab]] [[...->co2aa]]

Oh, is that how it is? All is well while I do everything YOU want, but when I, for once, want something from you... You know what? Fine. FINE! [[?->...-end]] [[!!!->...-end]] [[>_<->...-end]] [[...->...-end]]

Oh, you're more sad now? Is that how it is? And what am I supposed to do - make the problem just... go away? Grow up. [[:<->get-end]] [[;/->co4caa]] [[...->eh-end]]

Sure. Keep that up. See how that works out for ya when people just stop bothering. [[;/->...-end]] [[;__;->...-end]] [[...->...-end]]

What is it, Alex? Are you sad? Thinking? Did I burst your happy little bubble? Because I don't even know anymore, you're not TELLING me anything. I... I don't know if you're doing it on purpose or not. Or... if it even matters. You can't expect me to guess your every thought. It's not fair. I really like you, but I can't be the only one pushing this relationship forward. I thought it was just a funny bit we were doing, but... I don't know. It's time to step up, Alex. I'm done guessing. [[:3->get-end]] [[:<->get-end]] [[>_>->get-end]] [[...->get-end]]

You don't get it, do you? [[?->end]] [[:<->end]] [[>_>->end]] [[...->end]]

Oh, you're unhappy? Good - I'm unhappy, too. Maybe one of us should do something about it. Because I'm done. [[>_>->end]] [[:c->end]] [[...->end]]

... Ehhh. [[;__;->end]] [[;/->end]] [[...->end]]

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Ok, ok. But what do you think about the twist? I mean, it takes balls to kill half your regular cast... Not that that makes it any better. [[¯\_(ツ)_/¯->1a]] [[>:[ -> 1b]] [[: DDD -> 1c]]

Oh, come on. You gotta have an opinion one way or the other. [[¯\_(ツ)_/¯->2aa]] [[:f->2ab]] [[>.>->2ac]]

I know, right? Like, I know they're gonna bring them back at some point - and that's why I'm so pissed. It's just a cheap shot at our feels. ... And it works. [[^^->2ba]] [[>:|->2bb]] [[...->btw]]

Oh my god, you're terrible. Thought to be honest, I don't even know why I expected any better. [[^^->2ca]] [[;P->2ca]] [[;/->2cb]] [[...->2cb]]

Really? After some twenty movies they change the whole formula and YOU don't care? I don't buy it. [[<_<->3aaa]] [[;f->3aaa]] [[:3->3aab]] [[...->3aac]]

No. Don't start it. I don't wanna hear about the futility of stewing in a muck of regurgitated opinions and their inherent meaninglessness. Once was enough. ... Once was much, much more than enough. [[^^->3aba]] [[;P->3aba]] [[;/->3abb]] [[>_>->3abb]]

Okay, fine. True neutral, eh? You gotta stop playing Witcher, it's starting to show. I wanna grab some takout - you interested? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Alright - it's no crime. ... I still thing you're bullshitting me tho. That aside - you want takeout? I'm grabbing some. [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

By the way, I'm thinking of grabbing some takeout. You in? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Awesome. What are you hungry for? Pizza? Sushi? Chinese? [[:D->b2a]] [[:/->b2a]] [[;P->b2a]]

I'll... take that as a no. [[;P->btw2b]] [[>:|->btw2b]] [[...->btw2b]]

You're right. Whatever works, works. But it doesn't make me feel any better. Why is making bad movies a good policy? It shouldn't be. [[...->btw]] [[^^->3bab]] [[>:|->2bb]]

I feel ya, bro. I feel ya. [[...->btw]] [[^^->btw]] [[:|->btw]] [[;P->btw]]

Oh, shut up. Not everyone's a nihilistic little prick like you. Some of us wanna make this world a little better, you know? [[;)->4baba]] [[;P->4baba]] [[>:I->4baba]] [[...->4babb]]

Oh, screw you. ... I bet you have a heart in there somewhere. [[<3->5babaa]] [[:I->5babab]]

There's nothing to be smug about there. Hey, I'm grabbing takeout. You want? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Yeah, yeah. Cry me a river. I'm grabbing takeout - you in? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Called it! You in for takeout? I'm thinking of grabbing some. [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Yeah, you know what - nope. I know better than start this conversation. You want some takeout? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

... I bet you have a heart in there somewhere. [[<3->5babaa]] [[:I->5babab]]

Oh, come on! Being a prick is no reason for pride, you know. [[>.<->3caa]] [[^^->3cab]] [[...->3caa]]

Oh, don't pretend to be mad now. I'm not falling for that one again. [[>_>->3cba]] [[;p->3cbb]] [[...->3cba]]

I... You know what, if I'm getting this wrong, you can just... say that. I mean, it's cute that you can say so much without stooping down to the level of us mere mortals, but it wouldn't friggin hurt if you used actual words every once in a while. [[;f->btw3b]] [[>_>->btw3b]] [[:3->btw3b]] [[...->btw3b]]

Yeeep - words. In the meantime - ready for a rant? [[:D->prant1a]] [[>_>->prant1b]] [[...->prant1c]]

Good. Coz boy, I need to vent. [[...->rant1]]

Yeah, no - that was a rhetorical question. Buckle up. [[...->rant1]]

Buckle up. [[...->rant1]]

Okay, no. It doesn't work like that. You have to make a decision, you know. [[>_>->b3a]] [[;P->b3a]] [[<3->b3a]]

That's... I don't even know. You know what, okay. Sushi. Do you want sushi? [[:D->b4aa]] [[;/->b4ab]] [[;d->b4ac]]

Okay. What sushi do you want? [[:3->b5aa]] [[>_>->b5aa]] [[;d->b5aa]]

No sushi? What, then? Pizza? [[:3->5aba]] [[;/->5abb]] [[...->5abb]]

I, uhh... I don't even know what that means. ... Could you like... use words, maybe? I mean, it's cute that you can say so much without stooping down to the level of us mere mortals, but it wouldn't hurt if I didn't have to play 20 questions every damn time you want something. [[>_>->b5ac]] [[;P->b5ac]] [[:)->b5ac]] [[...->b5ac]]

... Aaaarrgh! Can't you... just... use WORDS goddammit? Can you do that? I mean... it's cute that you can say so much without ever stooping down to the level of us mere mortals, but you can't avoid talking forever. And it would be a BIG help here, you know? If I didn't have to play 20 questions every damn time you want something. [[:>->b6aa]] [[;/->b6aa]] [[;d->b6aa]] [[...->b6aa]]

You know what? Fuck it. You're lucky I even put up with this shit. I'm grabbing you the cheapest lunchbox on the menu. If you want something else, speak now or forever hold your peace. [[>_>->b7aa]] [[;P->b7aa]] [[:)->b7aa]] [[...->b7aa]]

Thought as much. ... While we wait - you ready for a rant? [[:D->prant1a]] [[>_>->prant1b]] [[...->prant1c]]

Thought as much. ... On a different note - ready for a rant? [[:D->prant1a]] [[>_>->prant1b]] [[...->prant1c]]

No, don't pretend you're angry with me. I know very damn well what you are - and so do you. [[;/->3cba]] [[^^->4caab]] [[...->3cba]]

Why yes, I AM a spoilsport. What you gonna do - wink at me to death? [[;););););)->wink]] [[;p->wink]] [[0_-->wink]] [[>:|->wink]]

Knew it. Btw, I'm grabbing takeout - you want some? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Goddammit, how do you live with yourself? That topic aside - you want takeout? I'm grabbing some. [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Yeah, no dice. I'm grabbing takeout - you want some? [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Okay, fine. Keep your secrets. Btw, you want takeout? I'm grabbing some. [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Alright, alright - I won't push. You want takeout? I'm grabbing some. [[^^->btw1a]] [[;/->btw1b]] [[>_>->btw1c]]

Okay. What pizza do you want? [[:D->6aba]] [[;d->6aba]] [[:I->6aba]] [[>_>->6aba]]

Okay, you know what - it's cute that you can say so much without ever stooping down to the level of us mere mortals, but I won't be playing 20 questions just to find out if there is something you want from me. If you want it - ask. I won't bite - unless, you know... you're SUSHI. Which I think you're not... or are you? Jokes aside - if you need something, I'm here. But, you know - you gotta tell me. [[>_>->6abb]] [[;d->6abb]] [[:3->6abb]] [[...->6abb]]

Yeah, thought as much. ... Wanna listen to me rant? [[:D->prant1a]] [[>_>->prant1b]] [[...->prant1c]]

You know what? NO. I'm not doing this anymore. It's cute that you can say so much without ever stooping down to the level of us mere mortals, but I won't be playing 20 questions just to find out if there is something you want from me. If you want something - ask. And, if the next thing that comes out of your mouth isn't the kind of pizza you want, I'm eating my pizza alone. [[>_>->6abb]] [[;/->6abb]] [[;p->6abb]] [[...->6abb]]

**Quiet** by Martyna "Lisza" Wasiluk         Play? [[:)->start]]

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